High School, Life

Senior year in High School, yes I'm in High School. I honestly did not enjoy High School. Still I'll tell you whether you're about to go or is already in high school, just be yourself. You don't need to fit in, trust me, it's NOT worth it. For me, I did not fit in at all, still I won't say I do. I moved to a city where majority of everyone there has been to an elementary and middle school together so obviously I felt really misplaced. The people I thought I could be with because they weren't from the same town just ended up trying too hard to fit in and left me lol Which is perfectly great because you see who they really are towards you so it saves the trouble. That did not make me feel at all obligated to change myself to 'fit' in at all still. I knew there was more out there than just High School and that it would definitely make that part of my life a joke if I really tried too hard to change... for a joke.

Around that time freshmen year a lot happened within my family. My biological father abandoned my family with no other family close by so I had to grow up right that second and help my poor mommy with everything and my little brothers. There were many sacrifices I had to give up to be there for my only mom and two brothers but of course it's worth it all because I love them. That time was also the time where you're young and you're trying to find a place in the world. High School pretty much was just a drag to wake up to with everything happening all at once. Freshmen year I lived my now Auntie, (before church friend) to go to school there. So I never saw my family and I was especially home sick everyday. So imagine how upsetting it is to go to High School that time :/ At the least though, I never got myself involved with school drama junk. Like I said, other things happen outside of High School so I kept myself busy by playing the guitar, drawing, singing etc. My mom worked hard and we got an apartment in the town where I went to school. From there on, I just helped myself and tried to find things to keep myself productive and make my mom proud. Of course, your grades are important no matter how much you hate your school and I do try my best that time despite the difficulties.

So I believe it was the summer of Freshmen year when I started makeup? I just felt so lonely and unexpressed and I needed to do something with myself and to look and feel better. That was also the summer I met my amazing boyfriend who I'm still with today. School wise, I don't belong in a group. I'm just my own group roaming around and leaving as soon as I can (lol). I didn't talk much, however talking and being shy is different. I talk when I have an opinion in a discussion or when I have question and that's what you should do too if you're a shy person. Don't be! Demand what you NEED to know and nothing is wrong with it :) If someone is going to talk to you, talk back! :) Talk when you have to. People take those more seriously because they only talk when it's important. (Not always of course but you know it's true majority of the time lol js)

But anyways, that was me in high school and still. Senior year, my classes are pretty good. Better than all my years there. I'm taking a lot of English and Writing classes this year, Music classes, Art and Theater. Some of these classes have very annoying people in it but times like these were you have to not care and just do what you got to do.

My suggestion is to plan what you need to do to get somewhere during High School. So that when you are out, you're good to go. Serious. You have A LOT of free time and those time I never try to not do anything no matter now poor I am. LIST GOALS, have dreams and create steps to get there. You could do something EVERYDAY if you just list them and cross them off one by one, accomplishing goal by goal. Writing them down will help you to do it more, trust me. ONLY if you want to make a difference bad enough, for yourself. Believe me, when you see that list of things crossed off, you'll feel proud. Since you're living, just do something. You'll have that day when you're dead and you will never have to do a thing again, great! But you're still here. Do something until then lol.

I really feel like I've learned a lot during High School years. I learned A LOT more about people and how to deal with it, how to make time, how to set goals, how to keep doing things even when unmotivated etc. It's not just words for me, I don't believe in words. I'm glad I set that for myself. YOU can do the exact same thing. You just need to want it bad enough to do it for yourself. No one else will, no one else will push you forever, no one else knows you like you do, so you, DO IT. No more words. Just do! I wish you all good luck! Live life and embrace what's closest to you <3


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